Photo by Soroush Karimi on Unsplash
We all need healing from something, and even though we want to, we can’t rush it. We can’t push it down or ignore it either. We have to work through it one day or even one moment at a time.
They say time heals all wounds, and that may be true, but only if you put the work in. You have to feel uncomfortable feelings, think through tough situations and try to find a way to make it out on the other side.
Because of all of that, you can’t deal with healing your traumas until you’re really ready for it. I’ve tried to this and failed a few times, and I’m sure I’ll keep failing in the future. We’re all guilty of trying to handle things before we’re ready sometimes, and healing is no different.
It’d be great if we could process big things right after they happened and then move on with our lives, but we can’t, at least not successfully.
It makes sense why we need to have time to process and work through things, especially if we’re sad or angry at the time, as those emotions can (and often do) cloud our judgments.
We need to be okay with taking time to process any healing that we’re trying to work though.
We need to be okay with not being able to button up every situation perfectly right after something happens. We need to be okay with being uncomfortable for a while.
If we don’t, no real change or metamorphosis can happen because we won’t really be giving ourselves a fair chance.
As much as it fucking sucks sometimes, we have to be okay and comfortable with knowing we don’t have all the answers and that we don’t know when we’ll end up getting those answers.
A lot of unfair things can happen in a lifetime. Some might have been your fault, but I’m guessing most of them weren’t. It can be really hard to process and move on from things that happen to us that we didn’t ask for or that make us feel like we’ve moved backwards in life.
But if we fight through those emotions and try to figure out what we can learn from them instead of ignoring them or shoving them down and pretending everything’s perfectly fine, real progress can be made.
There’s no set timeline for how long this will take, and it will be different for every single person on this planet and in the Universe.
But please don’t rush it. Don’t pretend like everything is fine and you’re over it if you’re really not. That’s not fair or authentic to you or anyone else.
This is your permission to think about things however long you need to, regardless of where other people think you should be in your journey by now. A lot of wild things have probably happened to you in your life, and I’m sure they’re not going to stop now.
We can’t control most of what happens to us in life, but we can control how we react to and process them.
The habits you start working on now could help you for years or decades to come. All you have to do is try. Don’t give up on yourself. You deserve to at least try to move on from your past trauma, whatever it was, and move onto your healing process.
Do not rush it. The healing will come if you let it and are open to it. Being open to it can be scary as fuck, but it’s a hell of a lot better than hiding and ignoring big events and occurrences in your life, I can promise you that.